Toxic Friendship – Friendship is a relationship of mutual affection between two or more persons. It is the state of having a natural feeling of likeness for someone. Friendship is an amazing and very exciting experience. Is meant to foster peace, love, harmony, and success.
Friendship is important in life because it promotes a great sense of value and a good sense of belonging. Friendship is also good for companionship; it puts a stop to loneliness and builds self-esteem.
Friendship goals are usually very important. Therefore, if you are in a friendship with someone or some person, it is advisable for you to set your friendship goals. Friends are usually there to defend, guide, help, encourage, respect, and appraise one, however, when all these are lacking; the friendship is toxic.
A typical friendship should be enviable and ideal but the moment your friendship is becoming resentful and unenviable to others around you, then, there is a problem somewhere, it is already becoming toxic.
Being in a toxic friendship can be as devastating as anything. It can also be a hellish experience as well. Therefore, do you care to know signs that indicate or signal toxic relationships and how to walk out of them? Simply read and follow these tips:
1. Poor Support
A friendship is toxic if your friend does not give you the necessary and needed support in your endeavors. The moment your friend(s) become pessimistic about your plans, then the friendship has become toxic.
Friends are supposed to be respectful to one another, however, if your friend becomes disrespectful to you all of a sudden, it means it is gradually tilting towards toxicity and you should keep an eye on this and prepare to walk out of it.
In an ideal situation, friends should quarrel and resolve it without any delay. Once the conflict is leading to holding grudges over every little misunderstanding, it just means that the friendship is becoming toxic and without being told, you should walk out of it.
A true friend should be happy for you especially when you achieve a great feat. However, if a friend whose role is supposed to be like those of the fans’ club is becoming angry, jealous, and envious of your achieved feat, please walk out as early as possible.
5. Incessant Conflicts
Friends fight but the moment there are more reasons to fight than to be at peace, and your friend becomes intentional with hurting you or vice versa, then your friendship is definitely toxic.
6. Being Abusive
Friendship should be fulfilling and not abusive, the abuse can be both physical and emotional, that is; it could be confrontational or verbal with the use of derogatory words on you. If such happens, consider your friendship toxic and leave before you become hurt.
Your friendship becomes toxic the moment your friend goes about gossiping about you. It means the loyalty is no longer there and you should take your leave once there is no more loyalty.
8. Lack of Understanding
The moment understanding is lacking in your friendship, just know that your friendship has become toxic. A true friend should ideally understand you to the core. When your friend misunderstands your jokes, or twists your words and then derives a reason to get angry, definitely you are already in a toxic friendship.
9. Lack of Trust
Once there is no trust in any relationship whatsoever, such a relationship is toxic. This is also applicable to friendship, any friend who would not trust you is not a good friend, and so you should take your leave.
A good friend should not engage you in any form of comparison, in fact, you should be the best version of anyone else to your friend. Having a friend who would always mention one hundred and one, million ways you have not done something right, you have not measured up to the task or you have not been acceptable and all is detrimental to your health and such could make life so miserable for you. You do not need a soothsayer to tell, you are in a toxic friendship and do well to walk away now.
Any friend who refuses to apologize to you when you express your feelings upon being hurt by her is unapologetic and also tilting towards making your friendship toxic. Please ensure you do not remain in such a friendship.
12. Ignoring Your Needs
A true friend should be there in times of need, any friend who is always giving one excuse or the other when she should render help to you is not just useless, but toxic because your friend should always see to your well-being and happiness. Once all of these are lacking, just take your leave immediately, your friendship is already toxic.
13. Feeling Unsafe
One of the dividends of friendship is safety, once in a friendship, you are feeling insecure, afraid, and less confident, please move out of such friendship if it is unideal for you.
How To Walk Out Of A Toxic Friendship
1. Refrain From Such Friends
Any friend who is toxic should be moved away from. It is necessary for you to stop being friends with such a person who is found guilty of all the points mentioned above. Follow friends with who you have mutual friendship goals.
2. Get Busy With Your Life
While trying to walk out of a toxic relationship, it is expedient for you to get busy so as for you not to be tempted to go back to them or even communicate with them.
3. Create Communication
A communication gap should be created between you and a toxic friend. On no condition should you engage them in a long conversation or chat, this will only make you remain vulnerable to them and their toxicity.
4. Create Your Boundaries
Create your boundaries with them and ensure you do not allow them to pass their boundaries with you. Let them know their limits with you, do not pretend about it.
5. Be Firm
In order to walk out of a toxic friendship, you need to be firm and intentional about it. Do not try to be empathic when it comes to blocking such friends out of your life.
6. Avoid Being In The Same Circle With Them
Avoid being in the same circle with toxic friends, they always find their way at getting at you, avoid them like plague.
Toxicity just like the name implies is harmful, demeaning, and generally unpleasant; so, try as much as possible to avoid it and every form of it, especially in friendship. This will help keep you sane at all times.